I MISS LAST WEEK WHEN THE WEATHER FELT LIKE SUMMER! Remember when we didn’t all have seasonal depression for two days? Remember when we went out wearing dresses without tights or coats because it was legitimately 80 degrees? MAN. Those were the days.
This is how all outfits should look; no layers! Well, I mean, technically the flannel was a layer BUT I didn’t even have to wear it because it was no joke 80 degrees. In February. It’s kind of exciting but as I was literally laying out on my back deck in a bikini I couldn’t help but think… ok yes the Earth is definitely in trouble. Also worth mentioning about this dress, I’m wearing a medium. It runs a little on the smaller side and I was way worried about it shrinking the first time I washed it.
My brother turned 32 last week (I think he’s 32….? Yes I’m 30 so that must be it) anyway… we went out for a quick drink at our local dive bar which apparently turns into a friggen college club now on Tuesday’s. It actually hurts my heart. I spent my 21st birthday at this sports bar and now there’s a DJ, fist pumpers, girls dancing on the bar in items that I wouldn’t even classify as clothes, napkins being thrown in the air. It’s ABSURD. AH. I digress. The point of that story was that this is what I wore that day and night. I ran out of the house with a coat on because I expected it to be freezing and the air was still warm. It made me so so so so happy, for two days, and now it’s back to big puffy winter coats and boots. BLEH.
So on my instagram this week I went on a little rant about body image, and what I decided was that I am going to stop tweaking my photos to make myself appear to be physically different. I’ve only ever done this to my hips and butt area, really, (maybe a little smoothing of the skin up close) but it’s got to stop. I’ve been working very hard on my body in the gym and while I have a long journey ahead of me before I feel like I’ll be completely happy with my body, if that ever happens, I am so happy with where I’m at today. It is SO EASY to beat yourself up and compare yourself to others, ESPECIALLY if you are a blogger. It used to be oh she has more followers than me, she gets more likes than me… and then it snowballs into her boobs are bigger, her legs are longer, she has a thigh gap, her hair is perfect, she’s also had two kids and she doesn’t have any stretch marks or that extra saggy skin around her mid section that won’t. fucking. go away. It started to drive me insane. I became so fixated on how I don’t look that I wasn’t appreciating how I do look. I shit you not, it was one of the biggest factors in why I stopped blogging in October. The pressure of comparing myself to others became way too much for me. I took a little step back from social media and blogging and started working on myself. Not only physically but mentally as well, really accepting who I am and what I bring to the table. I’ve had two kids… and sometimes I’m like well jesus Kennedy is almost 4 there’s no excuse to still look like this! But then I’m like jesus Kennedy is only almost 4 and I’ve come a long way from where I was! I can’t compare my body now to the body I had when I was in college. I can’t compare the body I have now to someone else’s body who may or may not have had kids, who may work harder than me on getting the body they have, who may eat all the right things and never touch a doughnut. I am who I am and I’m working with what I got but I am going to try my absolute hardest to keep it 100% authentic moving forward. No more making my ass look thinner in my photos. What you see is what you get from now on!